Still here and here, still.

Us. Loveseat.

Good morning from my office, the one next to our dining room table which is covered in laundry and uneaten pancakes, still a bit sticky from last night’s mac n cheese for dinner.
Cuz we’re fancy when Kel’s out of town. We sent him on sabbatical by the way, shipped him to a cabin in the woods to talk walks and read books and pray.  I think it’s my season to take special care of him, because marriage has seasons like that, doesn’t it?

So I’ve been solo parenting these past few days, but I refuse to whine about it because I know too many single moms that do it solo  They’re some of my most super-est heroes. (I’m looking at you Jenae, you stalker)  


A few hours before Kel left I posted a chalkboard list, asking for ideas to pass the timewhile Kel is away.  I was going to sew the kids a puppet theater, and take them to the library, we were going to make the 45 min trek to the Children’s Museum.

I had big plans to cram the hours full so they’d fly right by.

But we didn’t do most of that list, we played and baked and read a lot but we only left the house together once.  There just wasn’t anyplace we needed to go, we found great contentment in the sweet right here.

Pitawich!We dug into all those new Christmas toys.  We giggled a lot as Noelle invented a new lunch called the pita-wich, a sandwich, IN A PITA!  We think it’s funny but odds are you  had to be here.

I wiped their noses a lot.

We ate mostly clementines and leftovers.

I annoyed Caedmon by sneaking up on him and clipping clothespins on his shirt.

I became a novice railroad engineer by building tracks on the train table.

photo copy 4 We watched Cars 2, a lot and I let them Vroom cars on my head and legs.

My dear friend Jessica came over to help me a bit and I opened up my heart to her.

I spent a lot of time sitting still, snuggling my children more than I have in months.

I doled out hundreds of kisses on their faces and necks, irritating amounts of kisses.

I’m a goer, a doer, a producer, but these past few days I realized that how much I’ve shortchanged my motherhood.

photo copy 3 When they fell asleep I cleaned up the most pressing messes and then headed to bed to read and write and be still some more.

Because we needed this cozy, simple stillness. I needed to remember who I am and see these two beauties for who they are, which is exactly who they were created to be.

Sometimes I see the mothering as the distraction, the roadblock standing between me and what I need to be doing.

photo copy 2 I know that sometimes it will still feel like that.  Things aren’t perfect around here, I’m not living in an permanent state of mom-gasm like some women SEEM to be.  I freak out, I lose it, I need a break from the noise and crazy on a bi-hourly basis.

But this morning as I sip my luke warm coffee I’m simply thankful for the sweet, still right here.

I’m also thankful that Kel gets home in about 5 hours… not that I’m counting.

What’s grounding you these days?  How have you spent the first week of the New Year?

  • stacey

    This caused me to breathe deep. I’m glad it was a good time for you all. ((hugs))

  • Annette Skarin (@carinskarin)

    My sixteen year old grandson and I bonded. He listened to some of my writings and poetry. We were drug off to the swap-meet with my son and daughter-in-law. We took our own route and had fun rescuing one another from the booth come-on-down-have-we-got-a-deal-for-you-ers. I called him “mi nieto” all day and he called me “mi abuelita.” He bought himself a Mexican jacket, then spent a lot of time in the mirror booth. We sat on the curb while my son and his wife went lighting shopping. We made up a rap song about sitting on the ground with pee on the grass. It’s the funnest job in the world, being a grandma..

    • leannepenny

      That is just amazing. I love every part of that, except maybe the pee grass?

      • Annette Skarin (@carinskarin)

        You know that little patch of grass in a parking lot that you just know a dog has used for a pee break…yet you don’t care in the moment, so you sit there anyway. It made it okay when we turned it into a rap.

  • Mark Allman (@Vaderalman)

    Sounds like this sabbatical might have been good for all of you!

  • Andrew Gilmore

    Sometimes I get frustrated that I don’t have more time to write, but then I remember that I would quit writing without second thought for my kids.

    Looking back, my happiest times are always when I’m investing in my wife and kiddos.

    Thanks for the reminder!

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