My amazing friend Hannah (read more about her at the bottom!) says that lately everyday of her life feels like Groundhog Day. You know the movie where Bill Murray wakes up and does the same thing all over again, and again, and again, until he drives off a cliff?
Because if we’re honest, that’s what life feels like sometimes. It feels like we’re making great efforts all day long only to fall asleep exhausted wondering if we’re making any this busyness is going anywhere at all. And then… we get up and do it all over away.
(so put your little hand in mine….)
I wipe the same table so often it makes my head hurt.
I load the same dishwasher while saying the same things as I shoo the same kids out of the bottom rack.
I coerce my children to pick up the same toys off the same living room floor.
I cook meals that seem the same in the same pots at the same times.
And a lot of days I wonder about the smallness of my life, I know that in the grand scheme it amounts to so much but some days it feels like I’m stuck.
The other day I caught myself telling a friend that writing has been hard lately because I’ve exhausted all the inspiration I can find within these four walls. I commented about how I needed to get out more and have some new experiences to stir up the creative juices.
And while new experiences, vacations and escapes are good, needed sometimes, I don’t think they’re the solution as often as we think. So often when things are falling apart we think that we need to get away to fix things or find what we’re looking for.
But maybe, just maybe, we need to be more aware of what’s really going on… because I think that most of the time we need to stay to fix things properly.
Because I think that the act of staying, the cycle of the here and now is the most important worship we do all week. Mountaintop experiences are fantastic, because maybe the most formative spiritual moments happen sitting on those sticky dining room chairs or washing those dishes, again.
We need to realize that our “help me just get by” prayers are being answered with the gift of enough patience to see us through the next sibling spat OR just one enough gas money to get the van to the grocery store and back.
This house just might be the most important sanctuary in which I worship Our Father each week. Sure, in the day to day it doesn’t feel like that, but in the same way that water smoothes stones over time our hearts are being molded into something truly lovely and increasingly useful to God.
The most I sit and think on this over cups of tea, to the sounds of children chasing the cat in the other room, the deeper it sinks in and begins to radiate peace.
And this peace brings joy and this joy brings laughter, which bounces sweetly off these practical beige walls.
Perhaps this Rhythm of breakfast, stories, lunch, naps, trains, dinner and bath time is a lot more beautiful than I thought, surely it’s amounting to something world changing.
The endless shopping trips to the store for the same milk, eggs and bananas are my manna.
And I am sustained.
Are you feeling bogged down by the rhythm? Me too, but I think it really is going somewhere friend. Where do you find grace and beauty in your weekly worship?
Or if you need to vent how does your life feel like Groundhog’s Day? What’s making you want to drive off a cliff?
And just because I’m curious, what are your repetitive essentials? (Like I said we always need milk, eggs and bananas)
PS My friend Hannah (of the groundhog quote) is working on some amazing children’s books which will be released sometime next year and you better believe I’ll be doing giveaways. Here is a sneak peak of her work)