I’ve spent a lot of time in our mini-van lately, last weekend to Dallas, this past weekend a day trip to Oklahoma City. As my eyes take in the landscape of the southern plains, my mind wanders to all the different regions of this country, reflecting on all I have seen, and how freely we’re able to hop in the car and go.
Lately as my eyes take in the ever changing landscape, from small mountains to trees to scrubby grasslands, I can’t help but think about the freedom we have. The freedom to be. To go. To live.
I hold our mobility incredibly close to my heart as a freedom, a gift. A short road trip, something trivial for us, is a huge freedom for many in this world who may never know a world beyond their own 10 mile radius.
Yet, here we are free to strap our children safely in our van as they stare at little screens and eat healthy snacks and sip clean water from character themed sippy cups.
When we get to our destination they play happily in a water park or build custom stuffed animals with both parents by their sides. Later in the evening we have our food brought to us at restaurants of our choosing.
Oh Lord, we have so much, we have too much, we have everything.
With a little hard work and elbow grease we can improve our already fabulous situation, we can move across the country, change careers, aspire, dream, achieve.
There is no caste system holding us back.
Most medical diagnosis we receive will be easily treated.
If our children want to be a doctors, lawyers, writers or painters and are committed and called to do so, they likely can and will.
It all leaves me wondering why God sent my soul into my mother’s womb and set me up so well. Of course, it’s easy to focus on the grief in my life and consider myself unfortunate but no; I am blessed. blessed. blessed.
Am I spoiled rotten?
The faced of the oppressed worldwide continue to float across my mind, and I feel a sense of desperation, confusion and guilt. I have no idea what it’s like to feel trapped, to want, to have need… not really.
For me, feeling trapped is not having anywhere to go or anything to do with a gaping schedule hole. It’s feeling as though I don’t have enough “me time” to write, think or be.
And yet there are those in this world who are trapped by poverty, disease and persecution. And here I sit lamenting my small inconveniences.
I pray for humility and help raising our children with an innate knowledge that we are blessed and our possessions are not our life, in fact I fear they truly hinder it.
Perhaps we should have a garage sale and start over with simplicity, humility. Maybe I need to fling the doors wide open and sell it all, with exception to some pictures and the kid’s loveys. I fear it will take something that drastic to reset my white, middle class priorities.
I wonder if he’s having trouble shoving me through the eye of the proverbial needle.
Dear Lord keep us humble, keep us at prayer for those in true need, we realize that we are spoiled, that your love has been lavished upon us and we are thankful. We pray that even though we are spoiled, that we’re rotten or inedible.
May we still be wildly effective, may we get it, me we go as you lead.
And all the people said…
In what ways do you feel spoiled? What feels like a lavish freedom in your life?
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