On Shaving And Valentines Day


I received a text from my friend the other day, I am going to let her remain anonymous.

She asked me how the new sexuality series is going and told me how excited she was about the idea.

“I’m really tired of people thinking that marriage is where sex goes to die” she wrote me. She wrote about how she thinks our culture and society does a terrible job at portraying sex in marriage and then she added a quote … “Societies become the stories that they tell.”

In our societies we often perpetrate the idea that sex is only good before your wedding day, or right at the beginning or definitely before kids.

“It’s been told to us so thoroughly that we don’t even question it or realize that we have agreed with it.”

And she is absolutely right.

She texted me again last night: “Hey remember what I always told you about valentines day?”

Yup, I did. “Always shave your legs on valentines day.”

And then it all clicked, she was right, I stopped doing it after we got married, not because I think Kel particularly cares but because I didn’t think it mattered.

But I feel sexier with smooth legs, and painted nails for that matter.

So this morning I spent a little extra time in the shower, not because I really feel like smooth legs are my path to a healthier sexuality, but because it’s a way that I can invest in my sex life, myself as a sexy person.

I realize that shaves legs are something society has forced on women and that pisses some of you off to the nth degree. That’s fine, I am certain you have other habits or rituals or mantras that make you feel sexier, more mindful of your sexuality.

I shave for me, because I like the smoothness between the sheets and because if I don’t my hairy pits make me feel very self conscious in yoga class… for better of for worse.

So today, try to see your sexuality as something worth working for, either with a razor, a much needed conversation or some bright red nail polish.

Marriage is not, in fact, where sex goes to die and it doesn’t have to be just maintenance. It can be something more.

So with that, I have smooth legs and pits and some very cute Jamberry nail wraps on.

What makes you feel a little sexier or builds your confidence?

If you can do so today, Do it. Not just because it’s Valentines day, but because no act in investing in yourself is wasted.


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  • http://simply-rea.blogspot.com Rea

    Hmm. Good points. Trying to figure out what my ‘shaving’ is, because I regularly do it because I swim and the feeling of water on unshaven legs just feels weird. I think maybe for me it might mean buying some cute, little bit sexy, pajamas instead of always wearing the ratty old ones. 😀